Who wants to be a millionaire?

Tuesday, January 3, 2012
12:08 PM

Well, dear reader, I am a lottery winner.

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Just before Christmas I purchased a Christmas Millionaire lottery scratch card from Sainsbury’s and won the not inconsiderable sum of £200. No begging letters, please.

The card said there were 14 chances of a win and I duly won 14 times, in sums ranging from £10 to £25. All that money on one little card. Now I understood why people might strap their winning lottery tickets to their body. It is so stressful.

I decided to go straight into town and collect my winnings. My husband came with me as my bodyguard. Heading for a well known stationery and book store, we queued with a dozen or so shoppers at the lottery till.

My turn. I passed over my scratchcard. The young assistant passed it through the lottery machine; looked hard at it and then declared: “I’m afraid I can’t pay out sums as big as this, you’ll have to phone Camelot.”

I felt a frisson of excitement from the queuing customers. I suppose I should have explained it was not a fortune... but I didn’t