This Sunday should have been a celebration to remember for tragic Sian Ryan.

The popular former Copleston pupil – killed in a horrific crash on the A14 four years ago – would have turned 21 on September 22.

Her doting mother Chrissie today told of her ongoing pain at the loss of her beloved daughter – but pledged to mark Sian’s special day with a family party.

“We will never forget Siany, she is always in our thoughts and we are surrounded by pictures of her,” said Chrissie, 59.

“If she was still alive we would be planning a huge party so we felt it was really important to celebrate her.”

Sian’s six siblings will join Chrissie and her husband Mike, 64, as well as the former Copleston High School pupil’s friends for a party at the family home in Alan Road to raise money for East Anglia’s Children’s Hospices.

Sian died on August 17, 2009 aged just 16.

Chrissie said without her four other children, two step-children and six grandchildren she would not have been able to cope with the “unimaginable pain” of losing a child.

“We are coming through the other end,” she said. “I still don’t sleep properly but I don’t expect to ever again.

“Without my kids and grandkids I wouldn’t have got up, I wouldn’t have carried on.

“You never come to terms with losing your child. It took me a long time to get used to the idea that she wasn’t coming home. For a while I pretended she was on holiday. But then it starts to hit you and nothing you think or feel is ever the same again.

“I have been through some very difficult times in my life, but I believe everything was to make me strong for this, for my family.

“I always appreciate my kids. But losing Sian has made that even more important. “Whenever someone has a baby I always tell them to nurture and cherish their kids because you never know how long you will have them for.”

Chrissie, said that now Anna, 23, and Michael, 24, have left home, bound for the army and university, she is planning a new mission.

“I want to do something to create a special legacy for Sian,” she added.

“I want to make young people more aware of the fact they are in charge of a lethal weapon when they get behind the wheel. “I want to help youngsters think before getting into the car with friends. If I can help kids with a charity like Brake, it would mean so much.

“To do something incredible in Sian’s name would be the most fitting tribute to her beautiful soul.”

“I don’t know if I will ever forgive them”

Perri Daniel and Gavin Sahota were found guilty of causing the 16-year-old’s death by dangerous driving by a jury at Ipswich Crown Court in June 2010.

The pair were sentenced to three years in a young offenders’ institution.

“I don’t know if I will ever be able to forgive them,” said Chrissie.

“I believe Perri is in complete denial – she doesn’t believe she has done anything wrong.

“She only served 11 months. People commit burglary and steal money and get longer inside. My daughter was killed – it just isn’t right.

Sian was the front seat passenger in Daniel’s Citroen Saxo when it span out of control and crashed on the A14, colliding with a road sign at Nacton.

With only seven months’ driving experience between them, Daniel weaved across the road while Sahota performed a dangerous undertaking manoeuvre in his Audi A3 before the vehicles collided, causing the horror crash.