Toyah Willcox has been hormonal for as long as she can remember. Taken to see The Sound of Music for the seventh time by her even more hormonal mother in the hope it would make her more lady-like, the then eight-year-old just wanted to rebel against the townsfolk below.
As a terrible teen her parents asked her to invite her elusive friends round for tea; imagine their horror when 30 members of the local chapter of Hells Angels roared round the corner.
When she was 21, a very bad case of PMS and 15 Babychams led to a massive brawl during which she broke her record company boss’ nose.
“Someone was on a platform, a bit drunk, throwing lit matches on the band. I punched her in the face and this turned into a bar brawl that spread right across the entire floor of the venue.
“Kate Bush was there,” she laughs. “I just saw her minders lift her above the head of everyone and carry her out. The brawl stopped the show and spread out into the street,” says the punk princess, actress and TV presenter.
“I ended up in the middle of the street in just my underwear, that’s how bad the brawl was; my clothes were ripped off. You’re talking about 150 people fighting and we all got arrested.
“My record company boss tried to stop me fighting and I hit him. I was very wild back then; it wasn’t unusual for me to get into a punch up. I was very punky, very small and had to stand my ground an awful lot at the time.”
It’s hard to believe. The judge had the same problem; telling the court there was no way a woman that small could do that much damage.
Expect more stories like this, how she was ruled by PMT in her 30s, how everything changed for the better in her 40s and more when Julie Coombe and John McIsaac’s Hormonal Housewives returns to the Ipswich Regent.
Packed with new sketches, old favourites and some true tales, the cast tackle everything from divorce, full body waxes and competitive mothers to the challenge of IKEA and the madness of holiday reps.
“Some of the stories are very naughty and incredibly funny. That’s what I like about this show; you shut the door and shut the audience in and get really truthful. There are actually some unprintable things,” she laughs.
Women will really get it, says Toyah, who’s now in her 50s and as busy as ever.
“I find it quite Chaucerian; it’s vulgar but charming at the same time. It’s not condescending or patronising at all because we’re touching on subjects I think every woman has experienced. The evening recognises the unique hormonal experiences of women.”
Hormonal Housewives comes to the Ipswich Regent on March 6.
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