'I can’t explain how much it hurt' - mum who lost two children leads bereavement service

Doreen Savage hosted a bereavement service at St Mary’s Church in Bentley

Doreen Savage hosted a bereavement service at St Mary’s Church in Bentley - Credit: ProminentPR

A woman who lost two children when they were just 20 years old has helped lead a special service supporting those who have suffered bereavement.

Doreen Savage led the outdoor bereavement service at St Mary’s Church in Bentley, giving people a chance to contemplate and remember those who had died.

Bentley Church Bereavement Service

Doreen's two children both died suddenly and now she leads a bereavement service in Suffolk to help others who lost loved ones - Credit: ProminentPR

Mrs Savage said she knows what it feels like to lose loved ones - her children Deborah and Adam both died when they were just 20 years old.

Deborah had suddenly fell ill to meningitis in 1989, later passing away in hospital, while just three years later Mrs Savage’s son Adam died in a car crash on the M25.

Mrs Savage said she wanted to help people going through a similar traumatic experience.

Bentley Church

The garden at Bentley Church - Credit: ProminentPR

“I can’t explain how much it hurt,” she said, “even though it was now a long time ago, they are always in my heart and mind.

“The people we have lost are those that have made us what we are today - and their memories live on within us.

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“The services have always been done in the benefice but because of Covid-19 it was decided we would do individual outside services at each church.

“We have a tree of remembrance, a weeping willow in the churchyard, and hung wooden discs with messages to lost loved ones written on them.

“The discs were available at all the community spaces in the village – the pub, the shop the church.

“People could then hang the discs on the tree, we have probably in excess of 40 discs on there now.

“It was a warm and comforting service, that was the idea.”

Bentley Church Bereavement Service

The tree of remembrance with wooden discs inscribed with messages to lost loved ones - Credit: ProminentPR

The service, held on All Saints Day, was the second to be held outside in the churchyard due to the coronavirus pandemic.

Mrs Savage said: “We had learned a lot from last year’s service and wanted to make it even better.

“We had a fire pit and people gathered to say a prayer and share memories.

“The tree was lit up by solar lights and we gave out tea candles in a glass jar to put round the base of the tree in a circle.

“The discs will be left hanging on the tree over Christmas, which I think is quite poignant.”

For more on the Diocese of St Edmundsbury and Ipswich, visit www.cofesuffolk.org

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